DIY divorce vs. mediation in New York: which makes sense?

What DIY divorce means in New York

There are two main do-it-yourself tools from the New York courts. The first is the free DIY Uncontested Divorce Program. It is an online interview that fills in your court papers. The second is the Uncontested Divorce Packet, a set of court forms you complete yourself.

The DIY program has strict limits. Both spouses must be over 18. You must have no children under 21. The marriage must have been over for at least six months. All marital property and debt issues must already be settled. You also need a printer.

The court packet can be used with children, but it adds more forms. The courts say to use it only if you think the divorce will stay uncontested.

What DIY leaves you to work out alone

The forms record decisions. They do not help you make them. Court staff can explain procedures, but they cannot give legal advice. Here is what you would need to settle on your own.

• Spousal maintenance. The packet includes a Maintenance Guidelines Worksheet, form UD-8(2). You must work out the figures and decide whether to follow, change or waive them.
• Child support. Cases with children use a Child Support Worksheet, form UD-8(3), and more support forms. Child support must be decided before a judge will grant the divorce.
• Parenting. Custody and visitation for children 17 or younger must also be decided first. The forms do not help you build a parenting schedule.
• Property and retirement. The courts warn that if your spouse has a pension and you do not ask for your share, you may lose it permanently.
• Your agreement. A property agreement must be in writing, signed by both spouses and acknowledged like a deed. Acknowledged means signed before a notary or similar official.

When DIY makes sense

DIY is usually the lowest-cost path when everything is already agreed. That often means no children under 21, little shared property, no pensions to divide and no maintenance claim. If both of you are clear and comfortable, the free program may be all you need.

You still pay the court fees. They are $210 for an index number and $125 when you file the Request for Judicial Intervention and Note of Issue. If you cannot afford them, you can ask the court to waive them. You must also have your spouse served by another adult, not by you.

What mediation adds, and what it does not

Mediation is for the decisions the forms assume you have already made. A neutral mediator helps you talk through support, property and parenting until you reach terms you both accept. Those terms then go into a written settlement agreement.

Mediation does not replace the court. A judge still reviews the papers and signs the Judgment of Divorce. It also costs more than filing alone. At Smart Divorce NY, one flat fee covers the mediation sessions, an attorney for the legal work, the paperwork and the court filing.

If you are unsure which path fits, a short consultation with a mediator or attorney can help you see what is still unresolved.