Is divorce mediation confidential in New York?
Yes, on three levels. First, New York treats what is said while trying to settle as inadmissible: you cannot be quoted in court for an offer or admission made in mediation. Second, the mediator is bound to confidentiality by the standards certified mediators work under and by the agreement you sign at the start; the mediator does not report to the court and cannot be called to testify about the sessions except in narrow cases such as a threat of harm. Third, the only document that leaves mediation is the signed agreement, and it goes into a divorce file New York seals for a hundred years.
What confidential means in practice
The protection is strong. It is not absolute, and the exceptions are the ones you would want.
- Settlement talk is inadmissible. CPLR 4547: evidence of offers, conduct or statements made in compromise negotiations is not admissible to prove liability or the value of a claim. Mediation is compromise negotiation.
- The mediator. Certified mediators follow the New York courts’ Standards of Conduct for Mediators, which require confidentiality, and the agreement to mediate restates it. The mediator does not write reports and does not take sides later.
- The exceptions. A credible threat to harm someone, child abuse, or a crime about to be committed. These are not secrets a mediator keeps; everything else is.
- Your spouse. The agreement to mediate binds both spouses too, but it is a contract, not a gag: your spouse can still tell a friend. What they cannot do is use the sessions against you in court.
- The paperwork. Only the signed separation agreement and the court forms are filed, and matrimonial files are sealed under Domestic Relations Law §235. Your financial disclosure is in the sealed file, not on the internet.
CPLR 4547 (compromise and offers to compromise). New York State Unified Court System Standards of Conduct for Mediators. Domestic Relations Law §235 (sealing).